Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
