he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
