yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize