Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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