this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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