Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize