I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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