A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
