My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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