Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
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after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
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Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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