How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
