Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
