So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I have tasted many bathrooms
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
