so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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