you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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