Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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