Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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