chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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