why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize