In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
