I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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