so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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