hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
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