I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
