i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
