We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
