he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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