I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Do vagina's smell?
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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