Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Small penises have feelings too.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
