there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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