what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
