I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize