Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
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We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
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Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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