just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
