It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize