I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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