you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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