But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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