Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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