R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
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