absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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