i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
