WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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