i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
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