i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
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He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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