I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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