Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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