He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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