is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
