There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I think I am morally bankrupt
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
